Posts Tagged ‘Cousins’

52 weeks of Gratitude .. Week 3 is here and the topic is Family

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I have a big family, hence i have a lot of people to be thankful to. While I was growing up I have always been taught the values of Family, now grown up I have my own lessons learnt. To me family is most important, when everyone leaves you , when no one has time for you it is family who stands by you always, As they say Blood is thicker than water always.

Yes we have our ups and downs, some nasty experiences with some members of the family have also taught a handy lesson especially when things like property-money come into the picture, but still I do feel that Family is and should mean the most always.

As I have mentioned in a few articles since 17th Dec to 13th jan things have been going very bad and it is usually during the bad times that one tends to realise who is how close to you or who genuinely thinks about you and feels about you, I have been lucky that the phone or the emails or the whatsapp messages have not stopped at all, It never felt that i was alone here in uk or that almost all of the family is back home in India.

I have wished many a times that family was nearby so I could at least sit and Cry my heart out, I have also thought that maybe I need to stop everything i am doing and just go back each time there has always been someone on the other side of the phone ready to listen to me, yes I have friends here but it’s not enough, people have their own agenda here , will give you an example my supposedly BEST FRIENDS in uk came once to see me on the 3rd january and one of them had exactly 6 minutes to spare for me. YET we are the closest or so I thought all these years. Have-not had a Single phone call not that any of that would have helped , All that had to be done had to be done and I did do it all But not having enough family here in UK hurt a lot.

One of the disadvantages of living so far away from family :(.

I mentioned above that I have a big family but sadly now the number is dwindling , many of the older generation have passed away, that’s how life works I guess. I will need to go to India very soon for a few days to fulfil a religious duty and I have promised myself that I am going to Meet EACH AND EVERY member of my family where-ever they are in the country. I am going to forget for the time being the bad blood we have had or spilt especially after my dad passed away, and Just go meet them all and HUG them, Don’t know when the next time will be.

I must say that I am thankful to everyone as each and every member of the family has been so good to me, I am one of the lucky ones who has got Love from everyone, Since I was the first male child in the family I have been spoilt rotten .

My grandfather (both of them)

My Nani spoils me still , I talk to her on phone sometimes she is hard of hearing so can’t understand what I am saying, but she is sweet to say I should shut-up and listen to what she is saying, and she will listen to my replies when I come to see her in India.

My Maasi’s are lovely and my youngest Maasi is so adorable , I made her cry so many times as there is not much of a age difference between us, whenever I went to the village for summer vacation she made sure that i got Hot food, would put an extra dollop of Butter in my food compared to my sister’s or my cousins. The day she got married I remember going up-to her husband and threatening him to make sure he takes care of her or else :0..

All my cousins they are all such lovely human beings, being the eldest had an advantage, in Punjab we have this tradition calling veerji to elder brother, I miss that here in uk not many call me Veerji here. I have bullied my cousins at times, even shouted at them or maybe even slapped but never ever have they retaliated back even now I can vouch they have all grown up to be fine young men and women yet they just listen to my rants when I go on a tangent sometimes.. (Yeah I have my moments too )

I would not have liked to talk about my Chacha(Father’s brother) or Bhua’s (father’s sisters) but that would make me a hypocrite after what i have just written above, They are family too , whatever they have done for obvious reasons after my dad passed away is probably their thoughts, I can’t change that maybe they need the money property etc more than us, so its fine. I still want to say thanks to them because Chachu use to be a good man, he taught me how to ride a scooter and drive a jeep in my early days , he also taught me how to fire a rifle. Bhua’s got married and went to USA, but whenever they came to visit us , they brought a lot of goodies for me jackets,toys, sweets etc. etc. Dont know what has happened to all that love they use to have , maybe something wrong with me , maybe I did something wrong.

My Grandma (Dadi) – I had never ever felt she was my step Grandma, when I was growing up, so much love she had showered upon me, when I was in hostel She would come almost every other weekend to meet me , pampered me , during festivals give me so much money – gifts. My mom was only 16-17 when she had me so its my Grandma who practically raised me as a child, My bhua still complains of the fact that Once me and her daughter were playing in the garden – a snake was seen and my grand ma PICKED me up , running to safety leaving my cousin behind. But again sadly since my grand-pa and my father passed things have changed dramatically, I am no more even welcome to the main house we had when everyone live together.

But still this time when I go , I will make sure I go and take her blessings, even if the other side of the family have threatened to harm me. That doesn’t bother me because my parents my mother and father have always taught me to respect the elders no matter who they are , and the BEST thing they taught me was that no matter what fights the Grown ups had I should always respect them as I did before the fights.

My parents well all i can say is I am thankful they are my parents , WHATEVER,WHOEVER I am is because of them, Whatever I have learned – Earned – Got is all because of all the hard work they both have put in raising me. My parents have both worked very very hard especially since the day they were asked to leave the family house to start in a new house from scratch about a year after my Chacha got married. We started from a humble beginning One room house , as my father did not want to take anything from his father. I have seen some poor times but slowly through hard work my parents raised us. I can proudly say that I have studied in the One of the TOP 5 schools of India in those days.

I am so very thankful to them both, I hope I can live up to their expectations. I pray to god to never let me do anything that would hurt them, and hope sometimes that I have been a good boy in the family and have not hurt anyone deliberately.

I am thankful to god for making sure that I was born in such a beautiful family.

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Jab main chotha bacha tha badi sharaarat karta tha.. He he he

This is a story. A Story of Two cousins let’s call them B and R. I was in second year of my college. My cousin had come over to Chandigarh to study and along came his bike: a beautiful Yamaha Rx 100 Silver. THOSE WERE THE DAYS… Are they still around? The bikes? No idea. Anyway not deviating…

Well, it so happened that this cousin later went back to Gujarat for pursuing his education, but he left his bike back. Fun time for me, I had the choice of changing my vehicle to go to college. Then came the news that the bike needs to be sent back. Another cousin of mine had come to pick it up and book it on a cargo train to be sent.

But the DEVIL MIND woke up… Noooooooooooo!! 

 Cargo? Book on a train? WHAT’S THAT? Never heard of it…

So the scheming began on how to make sure that we don’t have to book the bike but instead drive it all the way. CAN YOU IMAGINE the thrill of it?? Well the first things we did was (we were intelligent after all) got the bike checked; oil, tyres etc. We went to Chandigarh railway station (well that’s what we told my dad). While we were supposed to be at railways station, we were sitting in Hot millions II.

As we came out, my grand-dad was coming down from a showroom, he asked what we were doing. I replied “Daddy we just came to get the bike checked so it was fine when it reached.” An hour later came home to announce, “CHANDIGARH DOES NOT DO BOOKING OF CARGO. The Guy at the ticket office said it will have to be done from DELHI.”

Parents they are so nice and good. Their kids won’t lie to them. I was the good child. 🙂 So, it was decided that we will ride the bike to Delhi, book it on a train and take a train ourselves for Gujarat.

We were so bad, Parents were good. So, we left. So let’s assume its Friday afternoon. We left for Delhi Railway station to get the bike booked. Me and my cousin, with a haversack and lots of money. What a ride it was! I guess at that time you don’t mind all that pollution and rubbish that flies at you, the truckers not giving you a damn. We had a few scares on way. Stopped at Panipat had some food by a dhaba, conserve money was the idea long way to Gujarat. At Dhaula kuan, someone told us to take a right and just keep driving. Well we reached Delhi around evening.

Then for some ODD REASON, wonder what it was , we had this IDEA to go to CP to Naruala’s for a burger since we had heard a lot about it. We did not have a clue where we were, the route but I guess that’s the fun of it. We were asking every other person, “Bhai sahib? CP?” and they would just point a direction towards which we sped. Finally reached Narula’s and had our fill. Now, this is the time we were supposed to get the bike on the train and call up parents telling them what train etc. So we called.

tring tring

A loud hoarse voice said, “Hello?”

“Haanji Papa, we have reached. The Train will not accept the bike. They said they can book it day after. So, what should we do?”

My father, OH bless him, with a worried voice, “Beta, you do that. Then go to Sidhu Uncle’s house. I will ring him. Paise hain? Do you have enough money?”

“No, Papa its fine. We have met up with one of my friends. We will stay in their house, get the bike on train and then take the next one ourselves.”

“Ok son. If you need money, go to Mr. Sidhu, and take care don’t do this .. that .. and call back.” (Thinking of it now , It makes me feel so bad.. Bad US)

Well now we had till Sunday evening to do whatever we wanted (read drive). So what did we decide (and this is my cousin he is a devil too)? He comes with this brilliant idea “Brother, its night time. Less traffic let’s go now only and sleep on way somewhere.”

So we left.

WHY DID WE GO?!

It was unbelievable driving at night; trucks at high speed, half the drivers high on some intoxicant, full beams and us on our little MR YAMAHA RX100. Anyway we went on and on… Sometime during the night we got really tired so we decided to rest and picked up a roadside dhaba. The guy was so nice; he greeted us and made tea for us.

The Tea was so lovely I had to ask for another cup, what with the whole day’s worth of Tea Leaves, Cardamoms and Laungs, Saunf in it. It was yummy. Anyone reading this should try it out, the Roadside dhaba tea is always so tasty. The guy was smiling, grinning all the time, he later told us we were looking like Batman. The only difference was our face was BLACK with the white of the eyes shining.

I wish we had the fancy mobile phones then get some pictures or even a camera. Had a wash with my cousin doing the honours of pumping the Hand pump, then I did till he washed. We were shattered so we lay on those roadside beds made of jute and within seconds, I bet we were snoring. We had told the dhabawalla to wake us at 4 in morning. Early morning we woke up, got ourselves ready. Kick started the bike, Put it in gear let the clutch go (we had parked on the right hand of the road).

As we turned left… PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN

A few choice abuses “TUHADI &%&%& and %^$£%$^%!!!” 

I guess we were still asleep because we did not see the big truck coming. Hahaha.

 Phewwwwwwwwwwww SAVED.

Gods were looking down on us. or were they ..

We had just gone 100 yards THUDDD: there was a Speed breaker. Did not see that either. The bike went flying. If you know the bike the key used to be on top along the speedometer. We thumped so bad the key flew away. God knows why we did not fall or anything. We stopped and parked to look for the key 🙂 It was still dark and could not see a thing.

IDEA!!! We started waving to passers by, and after a couple of cars gave two hoots to us, one Sikh gentleman in his Ambassador stopped.

“KI gal hai kaka?” So, we asked him if he could stop his car for a second so we could look for our key with the car’s Headlights. I tell you, Sikhs are great! Not only did he stop, he got down himself looking for the key. It was he who found it. He asked us what we were doing at that time.

We told him with pride and our chests puffed up, “Gujarat nu challe haan (going to Gujarat)”

He exclaimed, “MOTORCYLE te? Kamle hon? Ma-Pio ne kidaan jaan deta(on the bike? Are you mad? How did your Parents let you go”)?”

I so wanted to say parents don’t know he he he, but at that moment I let parents take the blame. Again BAD ME, I know. Well, we found the key and started off towards our destination. Some time later, Sun was rising. OH MAN it was AMAZING!! We were nearing Jaipur I think. India is so pristine, pity we don’t see it that way sometimes. If only administration did what it’s supposed to.

India is really beautiful (I MUST APOLOGISE TO MY READERS THAT THIS MAY BE HAPHAZARD, COURSE I HAVE FORGOTTEN A FEW DETAILS and NAMES). I remember there was this place a valley sorts, huge boulders, stone mountains a tiny road passing through and from far off you could see a truck meandering its way slowly. Sun rays falling, different colours; yellow, orange, red WOW. I don’t remember the name of the place but it was beautiful.

We reached Jaipur. One of my friends was doing hotel management there, so we  knocked at her door. I think she looked through a window and probably thought she should call the police, with two ruffians, black faces standing at her door, ringing the bell.

I had to speak “Its Bikram.” She opened the door, the usual hello hi, ages since we met, how is this/that, the usual rigmarole, I was too tired to carry on making small talk, She did not look happy as she had to make something to eat.. But friends are angel’s, I could see she hated going to the kitchen but God bless her she made some toasts , eggs I think (been a long time ) dont remember that far back) .

We ate,  went to sleep for sometime, rested a bit, washed yet again, started off again with promises made that if she talks to someone in chandigarh she better not tell we were there and that too on a bike .

My cousin was riding the bike while I held on to my dear life sitting behind him, telling him to change the gear, Slow down, break, car- truck and he would constantly say “SHUT UP! I know what I am doing.” It’s amazing how you are always a better driver then the other. How you instruct others saying they are doing wrong. It was early evening when we hit the outskirts of Ajmer. The drive was amazing, for a change there was not that much traffic. We did stop a couple of times for a cup of chai. I remember just before entering the city we got some petrol and went inside.

Ajmer is another beautiful place. I had a friend in Meo College, and I had already called him to say we were coming. So, met up with him. Talked about long lost childhood, I bet my cousin was bored to death at that time. In Ajmer we had a hearty meal, some mutton biryani along with some kebabs. We decided to stay the night there so that we could have a decent rest. We still had till Sunday evening to call parents and it was only Saturday evening/night yet, so, long time to go. It’s amazing in college days you always had so much time.

Nothing else happened (I am trying to remember what happened almost 11-12 years ago. Hence, the big holes in the story). The next morning, we set off. We asked for directions we were advised to go to Udaipur and then to GandhiNagar,  for some reason another direction came,  lets go to Mount Abu! It’s a hill resort in the desert. My cousin had heard how one his friends’ family had gone there for an outing and enjoyed it. I must say by this time we were not worried about parents finding cause there was nothing they could do now; they would do their shouting once we reached. Till then there were no worries.

… To be Continued ..