Archive for the ‘Thinking’ Category

10869784_10152539586531631_5639190144537728250_o (1)

52 weeks of Gratitude .. Week 7 Says the title is “A friend 1”

yaar ko humne ja-ba-ja dekha kahin zahir kahin chupa dekha..

Wherever I see, I find my friends everywhere. Visibly or indirectly, I see them all around me

Today I am going to talk about my best friend, The first I had, He was the only good thing to have happened to me during my school days (which were not very pretty), his name is Anup…. I can’t remember how we met, but we were in the same class and use to sit together. In our Xth class we sat in the second row Gagan, Me, Anupinder, Vinney Partap Brar, Bhupi virk, I front row were the girls 🙂 .. yeah you can trust me to sit behind the girls.

Holidays use to so much fun and I must say here that those were the days when one could go to a FRIEND’S place unannounced, Patiala in those days was a beautiful place with not that much traffic as it is now. I can remember all those days so clearly,  We had a Brown Vijay Super scooter  with not that much petrol as was the case with most youngsters in those days, The poor scooter carried a lot of us and never broke down, Anup would be driving, me behind him, Vinney partap as third person, Sometimes We had Ajay too, ajay is Anup’s younger brother. Those were the the Mad days… The Clutch wire or the accelerator wire broke, one person held it behind.. He would shout Pull to accelerate or slow down to change the gear.. The guy behind would be doing the needful. Hilarious situations now that I think of/

The day we did not have the scooter it was the trusted ATLAS cycle, me sitting on the Danda in front and him paddling.. catching hold of the trolley behind a tractor to take a lift .. I would spend a lot of my holidays with them in patiala, sometimes he would come to stay with us in Chandigarh.

Aunty ji would make us jugs of milk shakes and Aloo paranthas.. Anup was funny if he got engrossed into reading a novel he would not move, Me and Ajay would do things to him 🙂 put his legs around , and stuff like that but Anup would be so busy and concentrating in the novel he would not mind. He was a very good basketball player.

I can still remember the trips to the 22 number phatak   (which sadly is all changed now, as they have built a flyover now) It use to be THE place in those days, everyone in evening would come , especially the lovely beautiful Patiala girls. A famous fast food place called Pick a chick  that served pizza’s and burger, Order the food then finishing a bottle of ketchup eating it up.

One incident that stands out to me ALWAYS  and (which I think changed me too) was we had gone to Jammu and Kashmir tour with our school, bad luck for Anup he was stuck with me ,  I was a hostler in school and got bullied a lot, sadly those guys were also in the same tour. I remember we were at Verinag where it is believed the River Jhelum starts and had a night stay at a place called KOKERNAG, for some odd reason these guys challenged us to come to their room in evening. I was a scary cat But I still remember to this Day Anup telling me We have to go , it’s the question of Sardari, honour we have been challenged so no matter what we have to go, I was trying to dissuade Anup into not going but he was adamant.

We did go both of us against the 7 or 8 of the gang, though we got beaten up but I am really happy we made that, and thanks to Anup I also had the courage to stand up to these bully’s.

The first time we had a drink together, The time when his grandparents had gone to Canada and we painted the village Red, loud music , dancing the whole night drinking.. it was awesome. I remember in those days punjab had black clouds in the form of terrorism, very risky to go out at night but we were super humans no care in the world. Ajay was the scapegoat when the drinks finished we would tie a turban on him, send him off to the liquor store to get some more. Dancing to some silly songs ALIBABA, Queen and stuff I bet the villagers felt what the hell was happening in the village.

Like me Anup was very fond of food, I guess I got it from him,  I remember once I landed in Patiala, Anup and Ajay were getting ready to go to some wedding and in Punjab or maybe all over India if you are invited to a party then it is understood that Everyone who is in the house is invited, no second thoughts about it, I did not even have a change of clothes so borrowed his. The reason I am mentioning this episode is because we ate so much at one stage it seemed that when ever they served fresh bowl of chicken it all landed on our plates.

After my Xth class I came to Chandigarh , he stayed in Patiala, Then went to Australia for higher studies , stayed there for six years, meantime in Chandigarh my group of friends changed.. a lot happened in those year.. But then I heard Anup was coming back and we met after so many years .. It was back to where we had left.. Nothing had changed between us, he had just become a bit Sophisticated, Drank Scotch on the rocks, used the word MATE a lot.. 🙂

He was so knowledgeable and knew a lot about World war stories, He would read so many books , I would envy him how he could manage..And the Shayari he did , he had a SHER for any occasion.. he could recite couplets from heer-ranjha , Mirza ghalib. He took so much pride in the surname MANN, very Fond of classical and jazz music, when he had come to UK I had trouble finding a nice Jazz place .. and Yeah STEAK he loved it , I took him to a pub here to have steak his words were “This is not Steak”.. The day I landed in Vancouver for his wedding, we hired a car and he took me straight to this place where they made STEAKS “This is a STEAK” he said ..

A funny incident happened at the restaurant we had hired a two-seater car, automatic, I was driving one for the first time in my life, I don’t know what it was but for some reason we could not get the key to start the engine, we fiddled around for ages, in the end we rung the company we hired from, I bet the girl at reception had a hearty laugh when she told us you have to put the car in parking, press the Clutch and then it will start.. Made us look dumb.

He was very outgoing, each time we talked on phone he would tell me he had gone for mountain climbing or sky diving.

I got invited to his wedding, Went to Canada, for his stag night we went to a club the hilarious thing was he was so tired for some reason, he went to sleep in the club while we drank our self senseless and danced around 🙂 But when the time came to come home I have no recollection of how we managed to get home, Anup brought us back somehow, I met his beautiful wife.. The wedding party was Good I remember Dancing all the evening with him and bhabhi ji.. The highlight of the evening was being introduced as Anup’s Best friend who had come all the way from England.

This article is dedicated to my Best friend Anupinder Singh Mann, he is missed and will be missed always and ever.. Sadly In August 2007 My best friend passed away due to an accident while sky diving. Anup where ever you are I love you my friend, and I miss you.. there is a lot of me that was made because of you and I am very thankful to you for that. I am a better person because of you. Thank you for being there all the time, Thank you a lot.. I prey to god that everyone has a friend like you.. Everyone deserves a good friend in their life, and you ARE the BEST.

I wish and pray I am half the man you were.

Anups Mum wrote this to me :- bikram .ajay was always my strength and anup was my weakness.but after going to canada he slowly became my strength too.every morning starts with his thoughts and every evening ends like that.when he was in australia he might have been going through rough times financially or emotionally but when asked how r u son he would always say ; chardi kala; that was anup never cribbing about anything. one common sentence every one said on his passing was that he had no mean bone in him. even to the servant he would not like if anyone said servant, no he would say domestic help. To his seniors he was never rude or reply back. he may be very upset by their behaviour maximum he would say mom it is okay status quo has to be maintained. That was my son and am proud that i gave birth to such a good human being who was such a puritan in deeds and thoughts. I could go on and on but i will finish here with these lines

na haath hi pakar sake na pakar sake daaman
itne karib se uth kar chala gaya koi.

Mainu Yaar mere Jaapde
Khuda Warge
Kisse Allah de Fakeer di
Dua warge…
(Anup and me just after passing out of 10th class)
Advertisements

10869784_10152539586531631_5639190144537728250_o (1)

52 weeks of Gratitude .. Week 5 Says the title is “Something Someone Gave you”

Life is very funny indeed, teaches us a lot of things, some good some bad. It is surly up to us, to either learn from the mistakes or do them again. Lucky are those who learn and don’t repeat them again. On other thought I am sure life will be pretty BLAND if not for the mistakes or the wrongs one has done, I guess it is these events that spice up life. I am sure I have done a lot A LOTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT (yeah it is a lot of T’s in that Lot, that is because it’s that many I have done) of Mistakes, have I learned well the answer to that is NO IDEA.

God has been very kind to me , in-spite of making all those mistakes there are so many people who love me and care for me , even if I have been bad to them, So Thank you to all of them for being in my life, for loving me so much. I do remember you all and LOVE you as much it is sad that life has taken few turns that we are not together any-more. I am sorry to have hurt all those who I have hurt, do forgive me if you CAN but maybe my mistakes are such that I can’t be forgiven. Anyway this post is not about all that ..

I have a few things that have been given to me over time by some lovely people who have loved me , cared for me which I have kept , I obviously can’t share all of them or share the stories behind because that is something very personal to me . But I can surly share one lovely gift I got from someone.

Sometimes I sit and go through the past , relive those beautiful days , Hoping will they Ever come back again, do the people who cared then – still care as much, because I surly care as much.

My question to everyone reading do you or have you also kept all these memories saved , the gifts you got, I have them all saved and as I mentioned earlier I go through them almost everyday.

November 2006

November 2006

Here’s wishing and praying Lord Ganesha looks upon all of you and fulfils all your wishes.

Ps:- I have not been visiting the lovely blogs I usually visit, LIFE as I said above is funny and it seems this year it is just not letting me go, one thing after the other keeps happening, very stressed and probably going in Depression 🙂 .. he he he he 🙂 🙂 .. Hopefully APRIL will come with better news. I am having to visit India soon have to take care of a few religious duties and other personal issues , so hoping that things will change. If I dont get to visit you all please pardon me ,, I will be visiting for sure .. Have a great day everyone.

52 weeks of Gratitude .. Week 2 is here and the the topic is Spouce / Significant other ..

10869784_10152539586531631_5639190144537728250_o (1)

I am not sure if this will be or can be considered a post BUT instead of writing a post , I want to put a song here as a musical gratitude


Ki hall hai tera mudat pichon takri hain

main v Badliya howanga par tu v vakhri hain

dooron-2 takda reha bula vi nahin sakia

main kam dil jeha tere nede aa v nahi sakia

likh ke tera naam mein sajde karda rehnda san

tu mera naam likh ke kade mitaundi c k Nahin

How are you – we met after ages

I will look changed and you look different too

Kept looking from far- could not call you

Me a No-one could not come near you either

I would write your name and look at it 

DID you ever write my name and erase it

mere baare hun ki tera kheyal main nahi puchda

ohna dina ch dasde mainu CHAHUNDI C K NAI

I am not asking what you think of me NOW

 BUT did you ever love me or wanted me THEN

Chutti vele appo apne pinda nu Jaana

Tera pata nahin par mere dil ghatda hi jaan

jehri thaan ton apne pind ne raah nikharde c

jehri thaan te o v apne vaang vicherde C

Bulliya vich muska ke tera mur k dekhna oh

Jaande jaande nazar aa de naal matha Tekna Oh

Ki daassa k pedal kinni parre lagde sun

Cycle hauli mere vang chalaundi c k nahin

School finished we went to our own villages

Dont know about you but my heart kept sinking

The place where the roads to our village parted

The place where like us -they parted too

A smile on your lips when you looked back at me

As you went the way your eyes said Bye

What can I say how hard the Pedals Felt 

Did you Too ride your Bicycle slowly like me

mere baare hun ki tera kheyal main nahi puchdaohna dina ch dasde mainu CHAHUNDI C K NAI I am not asking what you think of me NOW BUT did you ever love me or wanted me THEN
Kho Kho volley ball te pid vich firdiya mell diyanVehle period de vich bharah(12) taani khel diyaMainu yaad hai mere vaal eshare hunde cSach dassi ki charche mere bare hunde c

Tere naa te yaad hai menu cherreya kaiyaan ne

Mere naa te tenu koee bulaundi c k nahin

In the games fieldIn the free class ,we went to play outsideI remember your friends would point at meTell the truth what did they say about meMany teased me with YOUR NAME DID anyone call you by my NAME
mere baare hun ki tera kheyal main nahi puchdaohna dina ch dasde mainu CHAHUNDI C K NAI I am not asking what you think of me NOW BUT did you ever love me or wanted me THEN
Paadan likhan veele de zindagi changi hundi haiCharri na latthi na fikar na tanggi hundi haichutkalla ya kahani ya kuch hor sunaude neClassroom de vich student gaane gaaunde neMere jo kalaam OH bahute tere naam ne…Ni tu koi gaana mere bare gaaundi c k nahin Student life is very niceNo fuss,no end of moneyWe tell jokes and all to each othersSinging songs in the ClassroomsMy most writings are all in YOUR NAME Did you Ever sing any song for me
mere baare hun ki tera kheyal main nahi puchdaohna dina ch dasde mainu CHAHUNDI C K NAI I am not asking what you think of me NOW BUT did you ever love me or wanted me THEN
Khaabare tu aakhe o pyaar nahi kuch hor hi cCharhi jawani di bhul c kuch chir di lod hi cPar aishque shayer bachpan vaang masoom hi rehnde neEk paase vishwas ch hi zindagi kad lainde ne“DEBI” ne kai saal tera naam likhiya taariyan teTu v dass kade hawa ch ungalla vaundi c k nahin Maybe U feel it was not love but something elseA wrong doing because of YOUTHBUT poets-writers-lovers remain naïve like a Child in childhoodThey can live life on a one sided loyaltyI wrote your name on stars for a LOT OF YEARS Did you EVER write my name with your fingers in AIR
mere baare hun ki tera kheyal main nahi puchdaohna dina ch dasde mainu CHAHUNDI C K NAI I am not asking what you think of me NOW BUT did you ever love me or wanted me THEN


It’s been a long time since I posted something here as I have been struggling with some issues, that don’t seem to leave me alone but more on that later, don’t want to dampen the Christmas cheer but the recent events that have taken place in our neighbouring nation have given us enough to think. I don’t have words to describe the atrocity that has been committed against the little kids, Why it was done, WHO in their sane mind even thought about doing the act leave the planning part aside.

To call these people HUMAN is insulting itself, I can understand all this Jihad, fighting the oppressor, fighting for a cause etc etc BUT in my little mind I can’t understand what CAUSE IT IS? that says to attain it you have to kill innocent people … To stoop to such a level that you have had to kill little kids, Were you not man enough to take one someone your own SIZE.. Even with the amount of weaponry you had in your hands.

Where in ANY religion it says one has to go ,Kill innocent and that too little children, Rather it is said KIDS are God’s face, so how can it be right.

I fail to understand why are you people hell-bent on killing innocent humans, people whom you don’t know, people who you have never seen in your life, what in the world have they done to be treated by you like that, that you don’t give two hoots about them, Fine in your own twisted mind you have your own reasons or Evil thrill you guys get in killing an innocent human BUT pray let us know what they are.

I have read a lot of posts on what has happened, a lot of people like me have a lot to say and lot of blame game going on , But What makes me angry is why are we blaming others , It is
US the people, who are to be blamed, we have brought all this upon ourselves

The reason I say this is that in spite of knowing

1. Where the training centres are
2. Where these evil people are hiding
3. Where they get there weapons to do the mass murders
4. Who supports them

Nothing has ever been done, I heard the leaders in Pakistan speak the same words, our leaders spoke in India. The mentality of the so-called leaders is exactly the same irrespective of the country they live or lead. The same leaders were shouting at top of the voice after the Mumbai attack how their land is not being used to plan atrocities against neighbouring country. I hope they do the something now to make the world a better safer place, IF we can… as I think and feel that the damage is already done , it’s going to be so very difficult to hold the flow now. I only hope and wish innocent are not killed.

We the people found it amusing when the same atrocities were committed in other countries against other races or religions, because they were the KAFIRS, But sadly it is true with the saying “You reap what you SOW“… for years the leaders of our neighbouring nation has been sheltering the same people who are now doing the same against their own people.

I remember writing a letter to the Terrorist a few years back , where I pleaded them to stop killing innocent people and gave them enough options whom to kill otherwise, yet in all these madness it’s still the innocent who die ALWAYS. Never have I read news that a leader shot dead.

How hard can it be to find these bad people, if the leaders make up their minds and genuinely want to find them, We have read how the Intelligence agencies are involved one way or the other in helping these criminals, in the name of patriotism but is it REALLY that, what has all this patriotism brought so far, in all these years other than bloodshed and innocent dead. Where was all this intelligence when the little kids were being shot?

In my OWN TWISTED MIND, I want to ask the intelligence agencies was any of their relatives or family kids shot in the mayhem. Would they have done things differently if they had known it’s their own kin being targeted, or will they do something now.

It is sad what happened, Very sad, my heart wept hearing the kid say he doesn’t want to go to school anymore and the next moment it was filled with ANGER hearing that the Taliban have issued another threat that they will kill more if kids went for education.

We the human-kind are doing great, we are evolving, we have gone leaps ahead in this or that… YES we have but all this has it in any way changed the ways of life for a common man, I doubt it… it’s the common man if changed will change the ways of a country , the rich getting richer , the corrupt getting corrupter is not going to change anything …

I hope the leaders of our neighbouring country don’t put another of those committee’s to look into the security, to find reasons, to find the culprits… That does not work. It’s just a farce what has any of these committee’s ever done for the nation… other than use up the TAX money and waste them too. Time for action what action is taken depends upon how the people feel…

My heart-felt condolences to the people who were affected by this , and also I would like to say SORRY TO ALL THAT WERE AFFECTED BY THIS , SINCE AS A HUMAN, I ALONG WITH EVERYONE DID NOTHING ..

No wonder these people who bring about so much damage get away with what they want to do, when they want to, how they want to do… This will always continue till we wake up… I don’t know what will it take to wake us all, or when that will happen but I know one thing that when we ALL GET UP, STAND TOGETHER , All these terrorists will disappear… because after all they are amongst us, the enemy is within us all… we just need to open our eyes and find out who they are..

I got the following message on Whatsapp today

“Pakistan had made those terrorists, given birth to those terrorists, given shelter to those terrorists. These were own made terrorists of Pakistan. Those terrorists were made to spread terrorism in whole of world including India. And India is effected nation from terrorism by Pakistan. I do have sympathy but not of that much that we console and have sorrow of that much depth. After all how those terrorists were in Pakistan? Because they were under the protection and shelter of Pakistan. So we need not to be so sad on happened incident of enemy state Pakistan.”

To which I replied :-

Capture2

Capture3

Such are what we have become .. NO wonder so much hatred and atrocities are common in today’s modern world..

This is going to be another of those “THOSE” posts , I am not sure what I am wanting to write or say , other than a couple of observations, I was at work outside an Arena where they have late night gigs or shows etc.   People had to enter the premises , show their ticket , The bouncer at the gate tore about 80% of the ticket and gave back a little stub.

Now this is where I had a thought , we all go on and on and onnnnnnnnnnnnn about how to do less wastage etc , then why do everywhere they have such big tickets especially if it is to be torn away, and Since I have paid why don’t  I get to keep the 80% of the ticket..

I WANT THAT The bigger Stub, I have Spent my hard earned money on it ..  the little stub can be kept by the organisers at the gate, they make MORE profit.. get back 20% of the ticket toooo .. They are mean

Dont you think it’s a genuine concern, moreover if I have entered the venue then why tear the ticket, why not just keep the whole of it, the stub that is left is also kept very safely ,  lest we lose it and at some stage we are asked to show the other piece or risk being thrown out of the venue..

It’s the same when one is travelling on a train, you hold on to that ticket because the ticket checker will come and you need it .. But when you are flying why do we need to Hold on to that stub for dear life ..

once you are on the plane..   you still hold on to it .. there is no need for that ….

it’s not as if half way into the flight a  ticket checker is going to come and say “TICKETS PLEASEEEEE””” . .. oh god I don’t have it ..

STOP THE PLANEEEEEEEEEE … Throw this person out of the DOOR ..

Talking about planes

What is this with number 13, the paranoia behind it and all.. Have you seen there is no row 13 on the plane .. I asked the stewardess why so ..

“oh because people think its unlucky to sit in row 13..”

Well there is not that much thinking being done, is there ?

Now I don’t say I am an expert or anything , but have a THINK, you are flying , munching on to those peanuts that they give you, suddenly at 33,000 ft when you having a large scotch in hand.. . all of a sudden

Row 13 seat A to F  drops off under the fuselage.. swishhhhhhhhh… Just like that .. GONE .. A huge hole under the fuselage and the row vanishes.. while everyone else carrying on with what they are doing .. Have you seen that …  I have never seen that

People in row 12 turning back and saying oooh that was lucky .. Wasn’t it

People in row 14 saying ooh brilliant .. look at that leg room Brilliant , I did not even pay for it .. for that extra leg room, if you are flying by Ryan air or other cheap airline you have to pay for that extra leg room ..

So anyway row 13 does not exist ..

Yet there is no space between row 12 and 14.. If one is so paranoid then should they not have a dummy row but not fill it.. I mean Are they hoping that when bad has to happen it will suddenly forget the maths..

God of death is coming to get Mr. Mann in Row 13..  Reaches up to row 12.. AH ha next row is MY MAN.. but oops one step it changes to Row 14.. Mr. Mann has a lucky escape just because he is sitting on Row 14 🙂   It does not happen that way..

Anyway just a few thoughts.. Have a great day ..

ps:- Pic courtesy Google pics.

I was reading a post by Irfaan,  which reminded me of this post I had earlier written, The art of Letter writing is becoming a endangered species ..

************************************

I walked into my office , the lady at the reception was sitting.

“Good morning Liz”…
“Good morning Bikraaaaam”. (This is how they pronounce my name)…

As I walked past her, she called me back, “Bik, I have something for you,” she had a blue envelope in her hands, passed it on to me … it was one of AIRMAIL Aerogramme that we had in India to post abroad.

OH MY GOD… I was like in shock… it’s the last thing I was expecting… A Letter for me … I mean we are in 21st century… Letters are not heard of I mean the Hand-Written ones , Now is the time of Blogs, Emails, Scraps, and SMS… Tweets etc… Off liners… Chats… Facebook…

Believe me it was nostalgic moment, I opened the letter carefully, cause the gum is bad and you have to tear off the corners to open it, I did not want to spoil anything. The letter was from my youngest MAASI (mum’s sister). All this time I had forgotten her Birthday was same as mine 11th November, and she wrote a letter to me. SHAME ON ME…

It was such a great feeling, I have so many handwritten letters from lots of people, When I had come to UK, I had made sure I brought all those with me, I am a sucker for such nostalgic stuff. I reached home and opened my box of Emotions-Memories-Warmth-Love, even when some of these have got torn and faded the memories they evoke are rich and resonant. So many memories came flooding back, not all Emails, SMS messages, Scraps invoke such emotions.

Oh all those lovely memories, I agree that world has changed and its time of technology, so many emails are sent every day, But imagine the Hand written letters, those carefully chosen words, written slowly, Imagine the thought going behind the words being written, then the time it took to reach, even though the news by that time was late yet it brought all that JOY, HAPINESS, WARMTH, TEAR, SORROW, everything with it and then you sat down to REPLY to it.

I remember I use to have a girl in my class, she later started to tie rakhi to me, immigrated to Australia after my 10th class, she use to write letters to me, every other week I use to get a letter, which I have till today all saved up, the fun things written in them, how she was finding living in Oz, what she was doing, the new people she was meeting, I knew her friends as she knew them there. I replied back to her telling her what is going on my side, my college days, what i was doing…

I also remember a few of my friends writing to me, The best are the letters that my dad wrote to me when I was in hostel , though they were basically STUDY HARD, STUDY and STUDY… yet thinking of them and seeing them brings back memories. My mother use to write to me in Punjabi, some of the words she used in the letters are sort of lost from the vocabulary now, the warmth – the sweetness- the love affection in it all.

These days all you get is a 160 character SMS or an occasional card especially on Birthdays, that too with 4 or maximum 5 words “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” “LOVE abcd”. I used to write long letters myself, I remember pestering people in the end of the letter why don’t they write more.

In School where I was studying SUNDAY use to be the Letter writing day, we were given the Blue inland letters , their use to be a special sitting, 10AM the bell would ring, all the students were to go to the dining hall, where the prefect would distribute the letter, while we wrote, then he would collect them and mark from his list who all have not given. It was compulsory to write, I remember I use to write 3 letters , To my parents , To my Grandparents Both sets.. Sometimes if I was in good mood write to other relatives, the letters were posted every Monday morning, so by the next week the wait started for the reply.

Lunch was at 1:30Pm, after lunch around 2pm all of us use to rush to the helper (BidhiChand was his name), he would have the letters that had come to us, he would distribute them, it was good moment if you got a letter , sad time if you did not, but nevertheless it was exciting.

Nowadays you start to write I am sure, hands start to ache, we are not used to writing anymore. It gives a very warm feeling when I check a handwritten letter from a close friend even after couple of years, the personal touch is missing in most of the communiqués that we send and receive these days. The Intimacy between the person who is writing and the one who has received the letter, sometimes you wonder that will the person you have written read the words as you have written, Will they understand the true meaning, the emotion behind those words.

If they don’t , then you write more to explain it all :), Wrote with more sincerity since it took longer to write, the heart to heart conversation that was etched on the paper, And the best thing was the beautiful stamps that were used.

Not all the emails or sms have the same magic as of those handwritten letters.

Check out the blog :-
By Pritish Nandy

 

ps:- Picture courtesy Google.

Hi I have had a few emails asking me to update my about me page and asking me other questions , So I thought of putting up this post that I had written a few years back, It still stands correct .. hopefully you can know me a bit more after reading this one 🙂  Also there are some who have been emailing a couple of my friends asking them what sort of person I am , I don’t know why it is necessary to ask and why not ask me directly, (by all means please skip reading as its nothing but stupid stuff)..  I want to say to them

pooch-tay haiN wo ke BIKRAM kaun hai
koi batlaaye humain ki hum batlaayen KYA

(they ask who Bikram is, Someone Tell me What DO I TELL THEM)

You know we go to some sites they ask us to create our profiles etc , and then write something about ourself .. The dating sites.. Blogging sites.. etc etc (yeah before everyone raises their eyebrows.. I am talking general.. I don’t visit dating sites , yeah Well actually not that OFTEN he he he )

So what do we write in there, do we know about ourselves so much as we think, or is it people around us who know us better.

Here is an attempt of what I think of myself Loads of people who read will differ because many of you have not met me.. or know me as a person.. But still I am assuming quiet a few would have an inkling of HOW I am.. “Liar, Honest, Pathetic, dependable etc etc , I have been called all these names.. ”

I think of myself as a Normal, common man having same aspirations as millions have, nothing out of blue.. I just want to be a millionaire, have tons of girl friends he he he .. no jokes apart..

Really I never had very high aspirations, I never had a thought of coming abroad, Not even till my final year in college. I was a normal kid, not good in studies but ok in sports.. Always wanted to be in the indian army..

Sat for the IMA exams 4 times cleared Each time, but for some reason SSB interview I was not good enough and for some odd reason I come abroad and am an officer here.. Not going through the SSB interview was one thing that hurt me, cause had not thought of any other thing, always was so sure I will get through the army.. Even joined a coaching place , talked to a few officers , my uncle was a brigadier , he was like There is no way I WILL NOT get through, it was on the BOARD.. anyway it happened and it HURT…

I am very emotional I must say, I have tears coming sometimes when I am alone thinking of stuff just random stuff.. don’t know if that is Pathetic or what…

I have made some wrong decisions and I accept them, but that’s what makes us what we are Today I think. It’s all these silly, stupid things we have all done while growing up that we Now KNOW are silly and stupid. If we had not then We would not know.

Back home in india I use to love going to movies or chilling with mates, We had such a big group, did some naughty things together, brings a smile on my face now.. Have had a pretty decent life so far. I have written about these incidents now and then ….

I miss people a lot, I remember almost everything that has happened so far, I can fairly remember the faces of all the people I know and there Names too.. And Yeah something weird I remember most of the Phone numbers. I also miss my home.

I hate people who are two-faced, to me IF you have said something or you have promised something then its a MAN’s word why should you step back from it AND or BUT In case you have to step back then you should be MAN enough to accept and be sorry , Rather than make excuses, which is the normal trend I feel nowadays, You promise something and when one cant do it then its easy to ignore thinking it will go away, I mean why yeah it will hurt if you own up, But then it makes it easier in life to move forward , to go and do the next thing…

I am of the belief that you should stand by your friends right or wrong, that’s what friends are for, no matter what, I rarely have made enemies but I am positive of one thing that if I cut off with someone than that person has no chance of being back in my good books 🙂 And if you are my enemy then You can bet your _ _ _ _ you will know it. I am not the one who will keep it in my heart , If I don’t like you .. You will be the first person to know about it, A bit rude but then that’s me and I don’t back down.. A lot of times things have been going fine but because of this attitude I have sometimes whirled the pool a bit, A bad point in me I know.

I hate a lot of things in me , and I try had to change that aspect of me.. 

Why am I so emotional

Why am I such an idiot

Why am I like this

Why does it matter to me if the world is collapsing, or the neighbour’s house is being burgled. Why do I have to stop when I see a guy following a girl and trying to pinch her purse or harass her, Who the hell is she or he to me .. WHY do I do that..

Why did I need to interfere when the guy who was drunk fell down on the pavement and Two other guys were going through his pockets and His mates who he had come with, were standing there being a spectator and Laughing over the stupidness of their friend.

These questions are constantly disturbing me, I constantly think of ways to change myself but I fail miserably …

Great. did it as I said its difficult to write about ourselves .. don’t know what else to write anyway this was something about me… Now all who read know a bit more about me 🙂