Archive for the ‘Questions’ Category

Here we are Christmas EVE.. 🙂 Tomorrow is Christmas .. So here’s wishing all my readers and everyone who visit here.. wish you all a

A VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE ..

From the bottom of my heart .. and so does  ME and My Random Thoughts

At our Christmas lunch , collected a few Christmas funnies that pop out of the crackers ..

cracker

So have a go at them and enjoy the day ..

1. What do you call Father Christmas in the beach??

2. What do you get if you cross Santa with a detective?

3.  What is the best Christmas Present in the World ?

4. Did Rudolph go to School ?

5. What did Adam say to his wife on the day before Christmas?
 ?

6. What did Father Christmas do when he went speed dating ?

7. What does Santa do with fat elves ?

8. What do you get if you cross Santa with a duck?

9. What do you call a blind dinosaur?

and Last but not the least ..

10. Where does Santa go when he’s sick?

Have a Great day tomorrow and I hope and wish Santa brings all the happiness and everything that each of you has wished for ..

Let me share one of my favorite songs too ..

 

What are your favorite Christmas songs ..

PS. A small lecture before I leave .. Please Dont Drink and Drive., Have a Safe Celebration.

 

Advertisements

First week of marathon and I am already lagging behind , Sorry everyone but Cant help not getting time to do anything other than work.. I have some now, so Posting the replies as promised to the earlier post …  We have some Lovely answers .. let me do Mine first and then we will accumulate all of them together …

1. Don’t change horses…………..                          Until they stop Running.. 

2. Strike While the……………………….               bug is close by  .. 🙂

3. It’s always darkest before…………..                 Daylight saving time 

4. Never underestimate the power of………….. Termites

5. You can lead a horse to the water but………… How  ?

6. Don’t bite the hand that…………..                       Looks dirty

7. No news is…………..                                                  Impossible 

8. A miss is as good as a…………..                             Mr. 

9. You can’t teach an old dog new…………..          Math.

10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll……….           you will STINK                           

 

 

Mine are not that clever , I have had some excellent Replies 🙂

 

1.

Don’t change horses…………...While riding

Don’t change horses…………... while you’re sitting on one!

Don’t change horses…………...while at the betting window.

Don’t change horses…………..change the jockey.
2.

Strike While the……………………….wrestling champion is sleeping.

Strike While the……………………….gun is loaded

Strike While the………………………. Iron is Hot.
3.

It’s always darkest before…………..the fridge door is opened.

It’s always darkest before………….. you find the light-switch.

It’s always darkest before…………..we switch on the light

4.

Never underestimate the power of…………..your toddler.

Never underestimate the power of…………..A jar of nutella

Never underestimate the power of………….. a bawling toddler.

Never underestimate the power of…………..stupidity in a large group (this stuck in my mind for a while😀

Never underestimate the power of…………..crooked politicians

Never underestimate the power of…………..Social media

Never underestimate the Power of………….. a Common Man.

5.

You can lead a horse to the water but…………..you can’t teach him to wash!

You can lead a horse to the water but…………..make it drink from a bottle of mineral water

You can lead a horse to the water but………….. can’t make it drink.

6.

Don’t bite the hand that…………..has just washed your butt.

Don’t bite the hand that………….. messy.

Don’t bite the hand that………….. that digs your grave

Don’t bite the hand that………….. holds the spoon.

Don’t bite the hand that………….. feeds you.

7.

No news is…………..the biggest horror in Shruti Aunty’s life.

No news is…………..news anymore – it is a bored man’s imagination.

No news is… ….. ….so peaceful.

No news is…………..100% true these days

8.

A miss is as good as a…………..mister.

A miss is as good as a …………..mistress

A miss is as good as a …………..Mrs

9.

You can’t teach an old dog new…………..ways to irritate your brother.

You can’t teach an old dog new………….ways to poop.

You can’t teach an old dog new………….masters

You can’t teach an old dog new………….tricks 

10.

If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………end up hairy and wet.

If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………, you’ll be the b****

If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………you’ll be drowned in cuddles and happiness.

If you lie down with dogs, you’ll………wake up with them

 

I hope I have got them all here , If I have missed any let me know please 🙂 and thank you all for all the replies 🙂  So here is a question which one is the most hilarious…

 

Anyone !!!!!

 

 

 

 

I think people do take me for a Fool sometimes, here is an example of something like that, I need some money desperately so I planned to sell My bike, put it on selling websites and got funny offers which have left me surprised, I somehow dont trust myself anymore the more I think about myself

The Ad. for the bike says

screenshot_2016-10-24-11-39-26

Got a few offers  and one came from Italy and here is what the person had to say, he offered to do a private sale via email 🙂 , I sent him a email saying it is available..  The response came

Hello
for the bike the offer price is € 900.
the offer reason is because I live in Italy, and the bike should be sent in my city, so the shipping costs around 500 €.
I want to know, the bike has engine problems? Abuto has problems in
I Await your kind reply. Yours sincerely.
Antonio

I was pretty happy for that Offer 🙂 so Replied back ..

Hi

I have no idea how to ship it to italy. There were no problems with the engine , I been driving it around .. but this year its just been sitting in the garage .. hence selling it

I have tons of spare parts also along with it , almost everything .

Thanks
Bik

 

The reply came ..

Hello.
So you accept my offer of € 900?
For shipment I inform me and I’ll let you know.
In the event that I agree to buy your bike, after seeing her in Italy and above all it checked by the mechanic, if you have problems we should feel.
It is a sign of assurance that I ask you, why
motorcycle goes first checked and then paid. I think even you would agree ..

This made me a bit curious, I wrote back

Hello

so you want me to send the motorcycle to Italy.. You will get it checked by a garage. and then pay me ..
What happens if you dont like the bike .. Who sends it BACK.. and What happens if you do not pay me after getting the bike in italy ..

Thanks

 

And the funniest was the reply.. have a read of this .. first the MATHS does not fit at all and I am a bit bamboozled

Hello.
Just what you say!
So I pay 50% deposit then shipping in Italy I checked by a mechanic. If there are problems I pay less according to the work that will have to carry the bike.
For example: the bike costs 900 € you pay at the beginning € 450 in Italy to the port there will be work to do than controlling costs 200/300 €, you pay the difference at the end ie 150/200 €.
I hope you understand.

 

I don’t understand the Maths as I said , I get 450 .. I pay 450 to port, then 200/300 for something .. so that makes 750.. he has offered 900 Euros.. which means I get 150 euros for the BIKE and that is also up in air .. once the bike lands in Italy I may not get anything 🙂

So basically I am selling the bike for 150 and doing all the exporting etc .. 🙂 BARGAINnnnnnnnnnnn

Or am I reading something Wrong here …

 

 

p

Do try to complete the following sentences , put them as a comment .. Just lets see what Funny replies we might get 🙂

Let me start with one

A. Love all, trust……………………………    ME  🙂 

B. An idle mind is ……………………………   Best way to Relax  🙂 

Comment Moderation is on, will try to put all the answers together , It should be great fun ..

1. Don’t change horses…………..

2. Strike While the……………………….

3. It’s always darkest before…………..

4. Never underestimate the power of…………..

5. You can lead a horse to the water but…………..

6. Don’t bite the hand that…………..

7. No news is…………..

8. A miss is as good as a…………..

9. You can’t teach an old dog new…………..

10. If you lie down with dogs, you’ll

 

So get set Goooooooooo …. 🙂

 

This has been Long pending as I have been on and off Blogging.  The A to Z challenge is also started today so I thought what best way then to start it with a Cheer..

A

It is lucky that the Award comes from a person whose name also starts with an A.. Amira gave this award to me .

liebster-award

According to the Rules I got to answer some of the questions .. Which are as follows ..

1. Describe yourself in seven words…

Seven words are surly too less to describe me 🙂  but here it goes

I AM ME – EVERYTHING GOOD  BAD UGLY 

that is 7 words 🙂

2.What keeps you up at night?

I am a sound sleeper, the moment my head hits the pillow ,  I am Zonked out..

3.Whom would you like to be?

No one really. I feel we are all unique, just be yourself why would we want to be like someone else. God made us all for a purpose lets try to find that and concentrate on that, why do we want to become like somebody else and do what they would do. That will double our work list for sure. 🙂

4. Why do you choose to be that person? (this makes it easier answering doesn’t it?)

N/A

5. What scares you?

LIFE. don’t want to sound grumpy or anything like that , but Life does scare me especially with the way things are , the way people are. I sometimes feel I was born too late, should have been born 40 -50 years earlier when people were at least not so much of hypocrites , as they are now.

6. What are the best and worst things about blogging?

Well the best thing is meeting so many people, knowing so many, even if we have not met personally it is a good sense or feeling to know that someone somewhere is thinking of you , or is worried. Like I found out when i was off blogging so many beautiful people asking If I am OK or not.

The worst thing that I feel is this hypocrisy among bloggers , this selfish attitude of a few , this you scratch my back I will scratch yours attitude. People like me get sucked into a false sense of relationship that oh the person on the other side is genuine but alas it does not turn out that way.

7. What was the last blog you looked at?

The last blog I visited was a lovely blog written by Beloo Mam

8. If you could change one thing about yourself what would it be?

Not be an Idiot any more… 🙂

9.If I want to read only one blog post from your blog, which post should I read?

Oh no, I don’t think I write that well that I  can recommend any of my posts, rather it is the other way round I should be thanking all the lovely people who come over to this blog and spend their precious time reading what I write.

So Thank you Everyone.

10.Tell us something about the person who tagged you.

What can I say THIS PERSON IS THE BEST.. she thought me worth enough of passing an AWARD. Definitely the BEST PERSON IN THE WORLD and a very good blogger too.

11. What is the one question that I should be asking you, instead of all of the above?

Oh boy, Now this has got me thinking. What is it that I want to be asked….

hmmmmmmmmm

mmmmmmmmmmmmm

Well I guess the best question we can ask another human being is , Hello How are you doing..

It goes a long way, a simple question.

 


DISCLAIMER:-
Please carry on reading this article if you are ready to think logically and understand.
1. If you are one of those people who will not listen to One wrong word against the country PLEASE STOP NOW, I am sorry.. This article is not for you, or for those who have one single track mind..
2. All those who think our country has nothing wrong ALSO STOP READING NOW.
3. All those who can only TALK and do nothing also STOP READING.
4. Please do read the whole of it before commenting

Zara Dholiya Dhol ute Daga lain oye
Hath rakh kan ute boli tun pain oye
Ful khidiya sab de man bhaunda
PUNJAB MERA RAHE WASDA

(Hey the man with the DHOL(drum), beat it , and sing the song, that as a flower is loved by everyone same way let my PUNJAB be loved to , let it live forever)

I remember the time when Punjab state was one of the most rich state, it was supposedly the state which fed the whole of the country .. But over the years things have changed drastically.. first the terrorism and now the political .. Actually hold on let me rephrase that.. The state of Punjab was always given a Step motherly treatment by the centre govt. I am sure no one can deny that.. look what that has done to this state.. (carved three states from one state),  then terrorism happened which took us so many years behind , A whole generation of Punjabi youth was finished , disintegrated in those years.. the after math of that we are still feeling and some of us are living the horror.

The Government as usual is only busy in filling their own coffers, no one has time for that man, The man who gets up early morning no matter what the weather is like rainy,chilly, hot … He gets up to go and tend to his farmland, his animals.. a Typical day in the life of a farmer .. I know because I have done it .. been there ..worn the tee 🙂

Get up at the first light of about 4:30/5 in morning , It a different story that if you did not get up the village Gurudwara’s granthi made sure you get up when he started with his daily routine on the Speakers..

Go to the fields to take a round , by the time you got back the ladies in the house had the fire burning, stoves ready .. getting the food ready .. Breakfast would be a Big Mug full of Lassi, with Paranthas… and off to fields .. Tilling the land, sowing the seeds, watering the fields , etc etc a non stop day of work .. work and more work.. with little respite from weather.. sun shining hard and mighty .. or the winter chill going right inside to the bones .. Feet went numb when watering the fields in the middle of the night …

But all that was worth  the hardship, when the first green leaf appeared from the soil .. It also meant the start of problems –  not one but so many of them …

Typically it is like either the Motor to the tube well burnt cause of the fluctuations in electricity, you get that fixed then there would be a problem with the tubewell itself.. Sometimes the water level would go down , with no water or there was  draught like situation… OR it would rain so much that there is excess of water  and we get floods…

The farmer has no other way then to go and get a loan from the bank, and hope that next season things will be different, with a bumper crop he can get rid of the loan, and earn some money.. the whole life cycle starts all over again .. but its the same outcome and this time he has not been able to pay the instalment also… So now he has no crop, plus a defaulter with the bank.. he sleeps hungry the one who feeds the whole nation. Farmers have a bad life, they are going to die one day struggling..

The loan gets passed on to family members who are left behind after the death of the person who took the loan.

If the crop gets a decent start then the new age diseases take over, Nature plays havoc.. Chet Singh says the rent of the land was Rs 50,000 per acre and Gurjeet had sown cotton there. “Weeks after Gurjeet’s death, whitefly ate up the cotton crop; Rs 14,000 per acre were spent to raise the crop and Rs 8,000 per acre has come as compensation. The debt still stands.” 

His son is jobless, no work .. and daughters are grown now. they have to be married soon .. Which well can he throw himself down to die, that’s why they think that its better to die than live like this every day, Why did this Farmer kill himself Hour before his daughter was to get Married

What is going to happen to our farmers, not just in Punjab but everywhere its the same story.. We who live in the cities take everything for granted, do we sit for once and think about those who are actually providing for us, We go to a shop and buy the stuff with our money, the money which we MAY have earned after working hard.. but just imagine the plight of that farmer who is working so much harder than us, so we can eat, Yet he does not get what is due to them.

We the people of a great nations are arguing over stupid things , spending hours on useless things, We need to Wake up, All this development that we keep barking about, is not good if the backbone of our country is broken and FARMERS are those backbone of our great nation.

So many farmers are committing suicides these days because of the intense pressure they are living under, it is sad. Every day there is a new story that gets published which tells a horrific story.

The Tribune is doing one such series, I have put links to some of there posts and it is heart rendering. The Tribune series on suffering families of farmers in Punjab who have committed suicide has evoked tremendous response from readers, many of who have expressed a wish to extend help. To facilitate contact with the families, they have given the names and phone numbers of the persons mentioned in the stories, or contacts in their families. 

BUT A PIECE OF ADVICE TO ALL WHO WANT TO HELP, PLEASE DON’T GIVE TO CHARITIES OR RELIGIOUS BODIES OR POLITICAL BODIES AS ALL THAT MONEY NEVER REACHES THE NEEDY.  IF SOMEONE WANTS TO HELP CONTACT THE PEOPLE DIRECTLY.

 

The SGPC which is a SIKH Religious body has so much money in its account , yet I have never heard any of it being used to save a life of a farmer.

The last time I visited my village we had a game of cricket at 5am in morning some pics..

As I woke up today I felt something different Not sure what but the day felt different, I sent a txt to a friend of mine here in uk to remind him about the 11am meet at the local club where a lot of fellow Indians who love their country were going to meet, as it is the Martyrdom day of three martyrs Bhagat Singh, Sukhdev and Rajguru, We have this get together once every month, usually it is on a weekend but today was a special day. After all the three great men had given the ultimate sacrifice without a second thought, just for the love of the nation. How many can we count who have done that or COULD do it.

It brought a thought that imagine if it was 1931 what atmosphere it would have been that day, the frenzy of the people when they got to know that the three hero’s had been hanged and that they took to the gallows smiling. Been wondering sometimes, what it would be, to actually be alive during the times of Sardar Bhagat Singh. It’s one thing to watch the movies describing him, his ideas what he did, how it all happened, but to be actually there is different.

Thousands of people who stood outside the jail, waiting to hear a word about their heroes, Imagine the FEAR the rulers had , How afraid they were of the Three young men, IMAGINE if it was 30 Young men or 300 Young men, If that can be made true today, imagine what 300 Young men can do for the love of their Country.

I sometimes think if I was at that age, am I cut up for such sacrifices, would I be able to do what the heroes at that time did. Would I have had the courage to defy the Government at that time? Or would I be a coward running scared? or worst be an obedient citizen going about my daily chores of life without batting an eyelid, cause that’s what most were doing otherwise how could a handful of British rule so many.

It makes me angry when I see a tom dick and harry, a two-bit politician taking all the glory BUT my blood boils in anger when I think of the people in our nation , WE are a BILLION PLUS and yet we let the idiots rule us, brought a memory when BJP won the elections a few months back so much was being said about this will happen that will happen.. but WHAT HAS HAPPENED. We are still there , Look what happened a week back in Kolkata, to an OLD NUN 72 years old. That sums up everything on what we have become and WHAT great citizens we are of the great nation.

I am sure many of you will be saying OH this is isolated incident IS IT, every other week a gruesome atrocity is being done.. NOW just try to compare that with the days or the time in 1930-31, Imagine the JOSH, The vigour in the hearts of the YOUNG of that era, The love for the nation the love was so much they were ready to give their Life, Not RAPE the nation.

Yet people say we are advancing I am sorry it does not feel like that..

The youth of 1931 said Let us see how steadfast I am. One of my friends asked me to pray. When informed of my atheism, he said, “When your last days come, you will begin to believe.” I said, “No, dear sir, Never shall it happen. I consider it to be an act of degradation and demoralization. For such petty selfish motives, I shall never pray.” Reader and friends, is it vanity? If it is, I stand for it… (Bhagat Singh said that)

It was today so many years back that the youth of the nation showed the rulers that they were no longer afraid to walk the talk , to walk up to that platform where they would KISS death and smilingly happily die for the nation, Hoping to be reborn YET AGAIN so they could try once again to free our great nation from the chains it was bound by, yes THEY believed in that , pity today they will probably die of SHAME if re-born, to see the state of our nation. Where WE the people have brought it to.

Here we are in the year 2015 yet again on the same fateful day, how many of us remember the Brave three , who gave their life in a hope for a better future for us , the US who don’t deserve this freedom, the US who have never ever done anything for our nation and probably will never do, the US who are hand in glove with the corrupt , the bad the traitors .. YES i call myself and others a traitor for we are seeing all this happen in our nation yet we go about as if nothing has happened, we don’t bat an eyelid over what is going on …

Jo bhara nahin hai bhavon se 

behti jisme rasdhaar nahin

woh hridya nahin Pathar hai

jisme swadesh ka pyar nahin

(That heart that does not have emotions, that does not have BLOOD running, That is not a  heart  it is  Stone,  that does not have the love of Country in it)

 

jisme na nijh gaurav

na nijh desh ka abhiman hai

woh nar nahin hai

Passu hai nira Mritak ke samaan hai

(The one who has no self-respect, or is proud of his country, that is not a MAN but a Dead person an ANIMAL they are)

When will the time come when we will all stand up together and do something , or have we gotten so shameless that we are not dreading the day when we will also reach where these martyrs are now looking down upon us, what will we say to them when they ask us “IS this why they gave their lives”..  HOW – WHAT will we say to them ..

When will the time come when indians will start to think that Time has come to re-sow the guns in our fields.. as the little Bhagat singh did ..

The only thing that has changed since independence is the color of the skin of the looters , it was white then Now its brown.

Here is something that I would love everyone to hear ,  Put the volume at normal and close your eyes Just listen..   a little tribute to the martyrs .. Hope we do something for them for our country which will make them proud of their fellow citizens , I know you all are very busy, but do spend some time listening , maybe it will wake us all up to do something someday.. just maybe


Scottish Celtic                                                                           English

Lay me doon in the caul caul groon                                     Lay me down in the cold cold ground
whaur afore monie mair huv gaun                                       where before many more have gone

when they come a wull staun ma groon                              When they come I will stand my ground..
staun ma groon                                                                        stand my ground
al nae be afraid                                                                        I will not be afraid

thought awe hame take awa ma fear                                   Thoughts of home  take away my fear
sweat an bluid hide ma veil awe tears                                 sweat and blood –  hide my veil of tears

ains a year say a prayer faur me                                Once a year  say a prayer for me
close yir een an remember me                                   CLOSE YOUR EYES AND REMEMBER ME 

nair main shall a see the sun                                                 Never more shall I see the SUN
for a fell tae a germans gun                                                   for I fell to a German’s gun

Lay me doon in the caul caul groon                                     Lay me down in the cold cold ground
whaur afore monie mair huv gaun                                       where before many more have gone