Archive for January, 2012

I have had a very adventurous life and have done a lot of stupid things in life and here they are.

1. Around 1992 or sometime then, One of my friends was getting married in a Punjab and around that time terrorism was still little bit left, Pillion riding was banned, so we went on our own bikes, reached the venue it was a late night wedding, enjoyed a lot had lots to drink, were all tipsy, someone decided let’s go back.. So off we went. On way back there was a roundabout on a GT road, usually you go around left, for some reason it was decided we go around the right side. As we did that OH MY GOD

God knows from where these Punjab Police Commandoes came, we could hear the click click of the rifles getting cocked… Get down… On the floor… It was scary… DAMN… We became sober in a second.

Thank god we were not shot, we had to plead the officer, show him our flying I-Cards to convince we were just playing around. They made us sit there for an hour before letting us go.

2. Final year exams, one of my friends decided to steal a empty answer sheet, so it could be used for cheating in the exam, I and Ravi my best friend went to the examination hall sat on the very first desks, next to the door… as the invigilator placed the answer sheet on first desk, Ravi got up, ran clutching the sheets, I ran after him, the teacher behind us shouting catch catch.. I was running after Ravi to make sure no one comes near because if caught this is a criminal offence and could be rusticated from university.  It is funny now thinking of it as Did the teacher not realise that even I have not returned back to the classroom.

3. On a nice Sunday morning four of us decided to go for a walk in the jungle (picture)  behind sukhna lake in Chandigarh, No one knew the way, obviously we got lost, whatever food, water we had finished, tired in middle of the afternoon we reached a lake, for some odd reason it was decided to swim through it rather than go around it, Sunil a friend was asked if he knew how to swim, he said yes..

There we go, took our clothes off put them in a carrier bag, In we went…we were half way in when there was a big splash, Sunil had run and jumped inside.. He went in, then his head popped up… and again down… OMG he had lied to us… we dashed towards him, Now Sunil is a 6ft 3 inches tall Big guy, Power lifting is his hobby I mean he is HUGE, I got hold of him he grabbed me , almost dragged me in with him. I somehow managed to get free.

Luckily there was this tree , sunil held on to it for dear life. The other two had come, I swam out, We took off our turbans, tied them up , threw it inside and pulled him out of water, a funny thing before that happened we asked Sunil to jump back in water and let go of the tree and we will pull him out, he replies “NO I am fine here “.. he he he he

He would have died that day. Later we met a villager he told us “Sahib Woh to das haathi Dob hai”. Meaning it’s as deep as ten elephants standing on top of each other.

4. Second year in college, we thought we were the bosses of college by then, One day instead of going straight to college I went to my friend Babbar’s house to go together with him, another mate Pummy was already there, as I entered they were pleased “oh good bikram you are here, we have a fight in university”, silly me didn’t even ask what it was, We went to our college to get hold of rest of the people.

I and one friend planned to go to uni to have a recce, to see what was going on, as we entered uni, next to the Gandhi Bhavan we saw a Big MOB, 100+, tall Strong, Sikh men standing. I looked like a kid in front of them, we did not take any notice of the guys at that time,  One of the guys in them was my Chachu’s(uncle)  best friend, I stopped to say hello to him, as we talked I asked him what are they doing as they studied in Punjabi university Patiala, his words were some idiots have threatened and challenged us to meet up here for a fight, OH MY GOD.. then it hit me ..

Then I realised they were the guys with whom Pummy had picked a fight. We were only at most 8 or 10 guys they were it seemed 100+. Never felt so alone in life, I quickly told him it’s us people who they were waiting for, I made up a story that I had asked my chachu to come too, so his friend said why, what’s the need since I was the nephew no need to fight, a compromise was reached. It was decided to get Pummy so he can shake hands on it, This guy got his car asked us to sit to drop us at our college gate, Believe me when I sat in the back seat I could see BATONS, SWORDS, HOCKEY STICKS, various other stuff.

I thanked god I saw this guy otherwise we would have got beaten black and blue that day.

5. A funny moment of madness, GT ROAD, Punjab, NCC Vayu sainik Camp held in Patiala, middle of the night someone decided we should run away from camp go for a walk, many of us got together, eloped into the night.

On to the road ANOTHER BRILLIANT idea struck someone lets walk naked on the main highway… Now imagine a group of boys, Naked, walking on the Grand Truck with cars blaring horns… the truck drivers using their dippers to full effect… We did that for a laugh but now it seems to be a moment of madness.

So lets hear what you guys have been up to , I would love to hear about them all. Ok here are the rules those who take it up make sure you tag it to 5 people.  That way We can have fun reading a few nice stories and re living those times , for even if they were moments of madness I bet now that you think of them they put a smile on your face.

Do leave a Url link in comments section so i can read tooo Please.

Have a great week ahead …

DISCLAIMER:- Please carry on reading this article if you think logically and understand.  PLEASE DONT READ is you are the new Gandhians. If you are one of those people who will not listen to One wrong word against the country PLEASE STOP NOW, I am sorry.. This article is not for you, or for those who have one single track mind..  All those who think our country has nothing wrong ALSO STOP READING NOW.
All those who can only TALK and do nothing also STOP READING.  ALSO This is not INDIA bashing its towards the INDIAN PEOPLE .. bashing those who wud not do anything but will be the first ones to argue or fight or shout and put others down… Its to people to accept the fault and work to fix it not sit and bask that we are doing good Thanks

Yesterday it was the 26th january .. the day our nation became a Republic, I deliberately this year did not record any of the programs that I usually watch, Now for some reason watching all that makes me sad.

It reminds me of what it should be and what it is ..

I was watching the movie Rang de basanti and it starts with the lead lady who wants to make a documentary on the freedom fighters of  our nation, she goes into a meeting to get funds and the project cleared , Why i am typing this is because there was a GREAT dialogue which got my attention and which left me thinking the guy and the lady say that if she Should forget making the documentary on the revolutionaries but instead makes a documentary on GANDHI.. the exact words were “GANDHI SELLS“.. and so very true it is  that’s all that sells in our great nation ..  just GANDHI and that’s what has been selling since ages. We are so blind to even see it. I bet that was SOLD yesterday too in New Delhi.

Today was the first time in all my life for as far as I remember I did not watch any of those lies being told by our leaders all over the country, we sit and listen hoping that This time maybe JUST maybe the guy behind the microphone is probably telling the truth.  It is a shame that during all those lectures and promises none of the people are remembered, who made this dream come true , the dream of celebrating the republic day of a nation, the ones who are the GIVERS of this dream to us..  WHICH IS GOOD. I am happy they are not remembered. They don’t deserve the embarrassment of being talked about by the corrupt leaders.

The story of the revolutionaries is forgotten by us indians ,  those 23 years olds who gave their life for us ..  Who fought A EMPIRE on their own and in process gave their life happily, smiling.. Praying that they are reborn again in the same nation so they can fight again against the tyranny of the Raj. ALAS this day I again feel that the revolutionaries will be so ashamed of us all.. as they say in hindi “LANNAT HAI HAMARE PE “..  These people gave their life for us all , for us for our nation but I seriously think why did they give their life FOR WHAT …  I seriously think that if any of these guys were alive they would literally kill themselves in shame .. IS THIS WHAT THEY FOUGHT . Is this why they gave their life for US.. the UNFAITHFUL.. the USELESS US all me including

I read a lot of blogs and articles today where a few have written how people felt emotional listening to the patriotic songs  .. it is such a pity that all this JOSH and patriotism comes on the ONE day and /OR maybe on the 15th august too.. the rest of the days we don’t give a damn about anything going on.

As I am writing the scene comes where the guy comes in stopping the people jiving to the western song, having a drink dancing etc.  in the movie telling them how indian society is screwed up and has a go at one of the friends who is a muslim and the other two jump in to save their friend .. and then says JAI HIND when he leaves..  exactly JAI HIND and that is by shouting, is that all we can do say jai hind and is that all .. is our job done by just saying it.. .

As I wrote in the comments at a few blogs I seriously think we need the british to come back to rule us all yet again , We don’t deserve this freedom.  AT least when british ruled us we knew who the enemy was but this freedom this independence has brought a lot of enemies, our very own people are the enemies now.. they have raped us again and again .. every 5 years they come and we smilingly and happily stand there NAKED.. to be taken for a ride for another 5 years .. I don’t know how many years more will it need for us to wake up .. its been 65 years since the Independence.

A lot has been going on politically in our nation for the last few years now but as usual all those rays of hope have slowly gone, with everything coming up everyone is the same , each one of these Khadi wearing people (I hate to say leaders), they think wearing pure white clothes will make them pure , they forget that all that their WHITE is full of BLACKREDGREY.. all those Dark colours ..  There is not a single leader who is genuinely interested in the welfare of the nation, each one of them has a hidden agenda and the BEST thing .. the BESTEST part is that in spite of knowing it all we still worship them .. OH yes I forgot the GANDHI FACTOR.. true people .. SO true .. the dialogue that I mentioned in the start that GANDHI SELLS .. Well it does isn’t it .. the so-called Gandhian TOPI.. The Khadi the White and all that IT SELLS and sells a LOTttttttttt.

I am amazed at what educated people have to say, when I talk to them about the nation , their reaction is either a shirk of shoulders or don’t know attitude, this is a sad scenario BUT I am still ok with that maybe we can teach them but what about the people who go on and ON and Onnnnnnnn about how great our nation is, how this and that REALLY.. GIVE it a conscious thought, Give it a logical thought, Think for once in your life .

ARE WE HAPPY WITH THE NATION WE HAVE NOW ? if the answer to that is YES then I am sorry to be BLUNT that is being Hypocrite (which by the way is another trait of us people).  Are we blind can’t we see.. IS this what we promise those martyrs each year that we will make the nation good , IS this what we are fulfilling. No our nation is no more Saare jahan se acha .. and that’s what the TRUTH is BUT YES we have the capability to make it one, if only we open our eyes , its only been 65 years not too late yet .. we CAN still do it and make our nation great BUT for that WE will have to

Open our eyes.

Open our mind  …. and WORK towards it. We owe to it to those people who brought us this freedom WHO put it in a PLATE for us but we have been so arrogant that we just did not bother to hold that plate parallel to the ground , rather we turned it upside down and let it all fall to the ground.

THE REAL CELEBRATION WOULD BE TO MAKE SURE WE BUILD THE INDIA THAT THEY HAD VISUALISED

Furling the national flag, singing the national anthem is not gonna achieve that. We have to start to WORK on making it better. We need to face the REALITY, till we do that nothing can be changed the first step to start changing or rectifying a PROBLEM is to Accept there IS A PROBLEM… if there is no problem then what are we rectifying NOTHING.

Lets forget about these leaders, just ignore them,  so what if a foreigner said india is dirty SO WHAT.. if it felt bad then maybe you should have gone and cleaned the place .. HECK I would do that I may not have the guts to go and die for the country but I can go and clean the place and I have done it ..

The work on making the country a better place has to start,  If each of us take just a couple of hours out of a week it can work wonders. The problem is we will not do anything, but the moment someone says this is wrong , that is wrong we all attack them like a swarm of bees.. What we DONT Do is try to rectify the wrongness.

Lets all get together and for once, give a thumbs down to politics/politicians/leaders/khadi clad people , instead of wasting our time listening to them – following them -worshiping them,  Do something for the nation, just one thing a week, and do it with all our heart. Each one of us , thats a billion people doing one thing.. thats a BILLION things happening each week. Let bring the dream back again which is SAARE JAHAN SE ACHA .. HINDUSTAAN HAMARA .  
 

Safaroshi ki tamanna ab hamare dil main hai– dekhna hai zor kitna bazue katil main hai   (the passion of patriotism dwells in our heart now, we want to test how powerful the enemy is)

Karta nahin kyun  doosra kuch baatcheet- dekhta hun main jise woh chup teri mehfil main hai (why doesn’t anyone talk, whoever I see around you is quiet)

Eh shaheed – E- emulak millat main tere upar nissar — ab teri himamt ka charcha gair ki mehfil main hai   (o my country i surrender myself to you ,  your courage is talked about by others now)

Waqt aane de bata denge tujhe ey aasma , hum abhi se kya batayen kya hamare dil main hai    (let the time come we will tell you ‘o’ sky – what do we say what is in our minds Now )

Kheench kar lai hai sabko katal hone ki umeed– aashiqon ka aaj jhamghat  Koochaye qatil main hai  ( the desire to be slain has brought everyone together, the group of lovers have come together)

Dekhna hai zor kitna bazue qatil main hai …

and oh yes INKI MAA KI AANKH .. the people who are ruling us.. as the british did

Looking forward to the comments I am gonna get after this article but after commenting do read the article again with a cool mind and think what I have said .. If you dont understand DO ASK….:)

Guess who

🙂

Try again

I know  I know the ISM’S are supposed to be humourous and all .. but then I am not that clever , all i have is some questions that I would like to ask and hopefully get some witty answers that will make other laugh too ..

So starting with the series here , I have other things to ask too .. the first few questions .. Tadaaaa

 

1. Why do supermarkets make the sick, walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

you enter a super market the first counter all the tobacco.. Oh I guess they want people to buy it and then have a nice little stroll to the pharmacy while have that Smoke .. ahh Bliss .

2. Why do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke.

🙂

 

3. Why do banks leave vault doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.  ? 

Yeah you need to visit the local Halifax building society or Barclay’s the pens are chained to the desk 🙂  just in case someone wants to nick the PRECIOUS pens.

 

4. Why do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds in our driveways and put our useless junk in the garage.

(when was the last time you went to your garage, I mean without the precious CAR 🙂 , it is packed with stuff that we have not used for months and probably will never use again,  Its called Hoarding I know but still ..

The old study table
The broken chair
That piece of old carpet that you thought you will use as door mat
That old crockery stuff that someone gave you , which you never liked so had it stored in the Garage.. 
The old broken bicycle… 
The old fish tank which you have been waiting to clean and fill up ready to be used.. Oh that was since year 2007..
The old fridge you kept for emergency use when you bought the new one ..
and so on..  )

 
 

PS:- One of my blogger friends has a book published, Please go and have a look at Bhargavi’s  Post

 

Pic’s courtsy Google ..

Mirror Mirror who is beautiful

Ps:- Thanks AB.

I had NCC in college Air Wing. We had a Vayu-Sainik Camp which was to be held in Lucknow. Prior to that, a Pre-Vayu Sainik camp was held in Ludhiana, Punjab, where contingents from all over Punjab and Haryana participated where we were to be selected to represent Punjab.We boarded a train from Ludhiana to Lucknow.  As it so happened, it was the time when the Ayodhya problem was going on. The trains were filled up with people going to Ayodhya. We found that our bogey was already full of such people and no one agreed to give us space to sit, although we had the bogey all booked. So, what happened next,  happened in a jiffy.Someone pushed my friend Babbar and everything went haywire. The whole group of cadets went berserk. We threw each one of those guys out of the bogey to reclaim our berths. And so started the adventure, on the journey towards Lucknow.

Early morning, the train stopped at a place called Bareilly.It was a bit cold and the tea vendors came serving tea in earthen pots. Mahipal is another friend of mine who is very naughty and pulls pranks every now and then. Well, he was sitting on the berth next to the door.He was ordering tea for everybody. We all thought Mahipal is being very hearty buying tea for everyone, little did we know of his plan. Well, the train blew the horn, ready to move, and we could hear the guy arguing with him over some money. As the train started to move, we could hear the tea guy saying “Babu ji, paisa de do.. Nahin to acha nahin hoga”(give me the money or it wont be good for you)… but Mahipal did not budge. As the train caught speed, we could not believe what the tea man did!  He filled a couple of cups with HOT TEA and threw it inside at us!!! And NOW, Mahipal had no SMILE, he was actually in pain where the hot tea had spilt on him. I would have loved to have a Camera at that time to take some pictures of full of Pain Mahipal 🙂

Just got over this episode, when we found that one of the cadets, oh bless! I have forgotten his name let’s call him “A”, he was found hanging for dear life at the door of the next bogey. We could see him banging the door, but no one was opening it. It was scary and we tried pulling the chain but the train would not stop. We were shouting, screaming but a moving train no one could listen. Then someone had the idea of waving red clothes, we had our shirts, tees, turbans all red-coloured,  waving outside. We crossed a few stations and about half an hour later, the train started to slow down. The moment it stopped, each one of us rushed out,shouting for the people in the next bogey to open the doors.. The train guard – the driver all came over.. We found that the next bogey was full of Army personnel and they had a lot of ammunition in the bogey. They didn’t open the door fearing they were being attacked! HOW STUPID THE EXCUSE SEEMS!!  (Thinking now had we got mobile phones we could have rung the emergency people or the police , to alert them about what was going on , It could have ended in a tragedy this little episode.)

Finally we reached Lucknow station to find out that the city was under curfew. We had nowhere to go, there were so many people on the platform. We took a corner, put all our luggage and stuff and sat waiting for some news. An hour or so later, we saw Mahipal come running with a couple of dozens of bananas. “Eat them, eat them.. hurry!!!”, he started to change his clothes while we had the bananas. Then we saw a man come with a big can, to tell us the story that he had been conned into selling bananas in exchange for 5 ltr can of kerosene oil .What had happened was Mahipal had found an empty kerosene canister, filled it with water, obviously the upper layer was full of oil. Hence the barter was made and the poor man, pranked. 😀

So, the adventure continued for the next 20 days in Lucknow which was under curfew, while our camp was in the army area. But more fun started when the girls’ contingent arrived. Each day after 5pm, the whole lot of us would make sure to have a bath and get ready in our best clothes to impress the girls. IT was in that camp that I first saw a beautiful girl. It was love at first sight, at least from my side :). 50% I was in …

After the initial few days of doing the typical boy thing walking around her, making sure I was there when she came out of girls camp site, the whole camp almost knew about this. I am sure she knew it too, although she denied knowing it. I was trying every possible way to get to talk to her but never got an opportunity something or the other always came in between. It was typical Bollywood scenes.

We were the bad boys of the camp, ended up in so many fights with other boys to prove that Punjab boys were the strongest. One day,we had this massive fight with the Agra boys. We had a boy on floor, me on top of him in a duel, and guess who comes by, SHE!  The Camp Commandant gets to hear about our heroics, well it was heroics then, so what happens he calls me and Babbar to have a word with him, and IT HAD TO BE right in front of the Girls Camp gate!  The CC is shouting at us.. he goes onto say “You with the RED Jacket, who do you think you are, You hit me 20 times I will not fall down But If I give you one punch, you will go flying”.. I HAD TO LAUGH AT THE DIALOGUE.. because I was almost 6ft, well-built and this guy was about 5ft 4inches, thin, Oh I so wanted to punch the living daylights out of him. AT THAT precise moment, the girl’s dinner bell goes, out comes SHE, watching me shouted at.

I have never felt so embarrassed in my life! I am sure she wished she had a camera to take a quick picture of me at that time 🙂

Soon, all the girls – even the ones from Chandigarh contingent stopped talking to us.

On the last day of the camp, we had a cultural show. The boys were performing the Bhangra, the girls had their Gidha, after our performance we were all standing together when my friends started to push me towards her, it was out in the open. I finally got the courage to go up to her and proposed to her the typical Punjabi style .. “I want to be fraaannds with you”  To which she replied we are already friends ..OH now what… I blurted “No not that way, the other way” 🙂 …she walked away I did not see her again that evening.

Next day we were to take the trains back to Punjab, I tried my level best to look for her, she was nowhere to be found, It was turmoil, my Sargent was shouting at me to hurry , in the end with a heavy heart thinking this is it I jumped in the last truck ferrying us to the station. My love story finished before it started…

We reached the station to find that there were two trains that we were booked on. Our train was at about 3pm, the girls’ train was at about 5pm. I was waiting, fingers crossed that there was still a chance to see her but luck was running away. Meanwhile, Mahipal was at his tricks, he was going around collecting money to go and buy some kebabs. Sometime later, he returned with them. As we had the first kebab, he made a comment saying they are beef … oooops with so many people into religion, we could see them trying to vomit it all out and GUESS what more kebabs for us.

As I was feasting on the kebab, Babbar told me “she” wants to talk to me, Oh my god, I went up to “HER”, there she was smiling, I didn’t know what to say when she handed me something gift wrapped,  (The reason I could not see her all day was because she was running around for a gift  for me .. awwww  (I know) ) ..  I was gob smacked did not know what to say, Opened the present it said “Dear Bikram .. Lots of Love R”..  That was a MIRACLE.. How did it happen , why did it happen ..

I don’t remember what we talked or what I even said. But I was the happiest person on that platform, I remember sitting on one those army trunks talking for so long. My friends making funny faces at us, while her friends kept doing the same to her.

Then came the time to board the trains,  I did not want to go, so I went to Babbar and told him I Want to go in the next train, he was like how is it possible, We found out that 10 boys of Ambala contingent were going in the same bogey as the girls (lucky devils, i cursed the person who had booked out tickets). We talked to their Sergeant but he would not budge saying do what we may, we will not be allowed to go in the girls’ bogey.

oooops…

I was not going to give up, First time in my life some girl had liked me, was talking to me , so now the race started to find someone to swap my place, but no one would agree. Who would want to do that, go with boys when they could go with such lovely beautiful girls in the same bogey… So we had to do what we had to do.

The 3pm train started to move… We caught hold of  two guys from Ambala , dragged them to our bogey, where they were kept hold of. Both the trains were to pass the station at Bareilly, the idea was at Bareilly, the idea was I will get down there, wait for the second train to come, board it and be with HER.  It would be dark, hopefully the Sergeant won’t see me enter the bogey.

Bareilly station came I got down with a friend, waited for the second train to come, then started looking for the bogey… suddenly I heard a voice “Bikram”… oh bless the sweetest voice.. another MIRACLE She had kept a seat for me next to her’s… we talked and talked the whole night, the next day… we both expressed our love for each other. So that’s how my LOVE started.

Wish in those days we had the luxury of Mobile phones or Cameras, to take pictures it would have been so beautiful to have captured those moments in camera, or the mobile phone would have come very handy when trying to figure out what bogey she was sitting in. Today, everything has become so easy, with the Internet and smart phones making love easier than before. But those times were difficult times, and who knows how many such love stories must be floating in the hearts of many a people like me.

This post is a part of Love-Adventure-Miracle contest by BlogAdda contests in association with Zapstore.com

Uma’s post today reminded of this post that i had written ages ago.. so thought of reposting it ..

The SNOOZE button on the ALARM :- Why have they made it .. I am yet to understand that .. Obviously if it is there then it is meant to be used …

You will use it

You will wake up and press it You cant help it, If it is there to be used   Am sure you are NOT going to say I have had a LONG sleep So I am going to have a NAP for another 10 minutes or 15

Have you seen this button on a FIRE ALARM..  Imagine If it had a snooze button .. someone running to you there is a FIRE in there ..

Will you say I tell you WHAT…  press the snooze, we will have an extra 15 minute.. let it burn a bit

HE HE HE HE 🙂

and Then have you experienced sometimes when you have woken before the Alarm goes offf..

thats the best ..

You look at the Clock and say NOOOOOOOOooooooooooo

I am not moving ..

 Oh NO SIR … NOT MOVING Till you go offf… I will wait for you to move and then Press the Snooze button .. keep laying there and then When you go off the second time I will get up

🙂

from this post you can well imagine i am bored at work it 2am in morning and i got two more hours to go please can you all remind me not to do favours to anyone i was to have a hockey game go to a pub have fun and then sleep but because i could not say no to a favour i have had to go play the game, shower change and get to work to do a night shift ahhhhhhh i am so sleepy now and tired and i know something is going to kick off. I am so looking forward to sleep and yes hopefully switch off the alarm.

PS:- Its Lohri today ..

Moongfalli di khusbooo  te Gud di mithaas                                          
Makki di Roti te Sarson da Saag
Dil di Khushi te Apniyaan Da pyaar
Mubarak hove Sab nu .. LOHRI da Teyohaaar

 Happy Lohri everyone