Unlikely things to hear on a valentines days
1. The perfect person for me DRUNK and IDIOT
2. I love your smell , I love your eyes .. WHY WHY Must you be a LABRADOR
3. I may be Dyslyxic but that does not mean I don’t volve you
4. I am bit a of a man for the LADIES .. doesnot matter how well the signs for the GENTS are posted ..
5. Be my valentine or die in a WELL
6. Do we have to go through this ____ every year ahhhhhhhhhhh
7. My darling wife
Roses are red Violets are blue
Valentines is jsut a commercial crap
Now don’t you have some ironing to do
8. Life with me baby is a ROLLER coaster .. it comes with weight restriction :O (oooops)
9. I got three words to say DREAM ON ___..
So People What other funny things can you come out with .. Lets hear them all..
Have a great Weekend… People
PS:- I also wrote a column .. On Reservation ( http://theviewspaper.net/reservations-and-the-youth-of-india/)
Me and My Random Thoughts 
The seventh one is too good and (perhaps) truthful 🙂
Destination Infinity
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He he he he 🙂 I ma sure in some cases it is true … thank you D I
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Lolzz! 7 and 8 are classic 😉
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Yes swaram .. Thank you thank you so much…
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Half of the jokes I did not even understand, Bikrammm!!!
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And what I could understand, did not sound funny. 🙂 Coz I like Valentines Day. And the whole concept of it too. Even if it has been commercialised.
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Hmm I am sorry if it didnot sound funny.. vaelntiens day should be every day not jsut for one day moreover its all a commecial thing..
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I am sorry about that …
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My stupid didn’t get many of the jokes! 😦
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🙂 Sorry na maybe I wrote it all wrong …
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I agree with punam.
And seriously Valentine’s day is a commercial crap.
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I am sorry it did not sound funny … Oh yes its jsut a comemriclal thing … People accept valentines even the ones who have black hearts …
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Did you write these jokes Bik? I am sure your wife LOVES YOU A LOT :))))
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he has a wife??? never heard of her.
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Not many have heard 🙂
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I am sure she does .. especially after this
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Well I hope she does love me after this.. Though i did mention Unlikely things one will say on valentiens .. 🙂
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Good ones ! Thanks for the laugh .Have a ‘all smiles’ weekend Bikram.
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🙂 GLad you enjoyed and had smile… I had a great weekend .. I hope you too had a great weekend ..
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Nice one….. 🙂
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Thanks… Irfaan.
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Each one is unique.
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THank you Chowla sir..
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Good ones. I liked no. 2 and 7 🙂
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Thank you Chhavi.. Glad you liked them 🙂
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ha ha nice ones! 🙂
and i liked your column on reservation. all the anger i had when i had faced counselling three years back was back! i sometimes wonder if we could change the world with our writings 🙂 keep writing more. all the best! 🙂
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Thank you CP. Glad you liked the column on reservation. I dont know if it will make a difference or no.. all we can do is hope that good sense prevails on the ones who are leading us and ON us tooo.. who choose these leaders …
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7th is the best:)
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Thank you So much. I am glad you liked it
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Did your wife read this yet Bik?
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🙂 WEll I will show it to her ::)
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lol
good collection
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Thank you SM.
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LOOKS LIKE ALL I HAVE BEEN DOING IS IRONING CLOTHES UNTIL NOW. HMMMM
@B: U R IN DEEP DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP TROUBLE.
@INSIGNIA: YES, HIS WIFE HAS READ IT.
@A: YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT.
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How you doing …
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M AGAIN – U WILL BE HEARING A LOTTT FROM ME NOW – U ASKED FOR IT.
1. The perfect person for me DRUNK and IDIOT
I M NEITHER OF THOSE – U SURE U MARRIED ME?
2. I love your smell , I love your eyes .. WHY WHY Must you be a LABRADOR
TIME WE GOT A LABRADOR – I AM GONNA CHOOSE ONE THAT’S THE MOST HOSTILE – SHOW HIM UR PIC AND MAKE SURE HE GREETS U AT THE DOOR.
3. I may be Dyslyxic but that does not mean I don’t volve you
OH U MEAN DYSLEXIC? DID I TELL YOU THAT I VOLVE YOU TOO?
4. I am bit a of a man for the LADIES .. doesnot matter how well the signs for the GENTS are posted ..
PARDON???!!! U SOBER?
5. Be my valentine or die in a WELL
SINCE THE FIRST ONE IS ALREADY TRUE, I GUESS DYING IN A WELL IS OUT OF THE QUESTION. SHOULD HAVE TOLD ME WHEN DATING.
6. Do we have to go through this ____ every year ahhhhhhhhhhh
YESSSSSSSSSSSSS. ABSOLUTELY. BILKUL. DEFINITELY. YOU DONT HAVE EVEN A TEENIE WEENIE CHOICE.
7. My darling wife
Roses are red Violets are blue
Valentines is jsut a commercial crap
Now don’t you have some ironing to do
OFCOURSE HUBBY DARLING – DO I REMEMBER U SAYING U HATE IRONING? WANNA GIVE IT A TRY THOUGH?
8. Life with me baby is a ROLLER coaster .. it comes with weight restriction :O (oooops)
YES OOPS – U JUST STEPPED ON THE WRONG FOOT, JAAN. DO U LIKE THE LOUNGE? THAT’S WHERE U WILL BE SPENDING A LONNG LONNG TIME.
9. I got three words to say DREAM ON ___..
FILL IN THE BLANKS? I WILL LET YOU DO THAT AS YOU PONDER IN THE LOUNGE.
So People What other funny things can you come out with .. Lets hear them all..
Have a great Weekend… People
UR WEEKEND – ?????? ???? ??? ? ?
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ooops
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Was madam ‘M” your wife??…u r in awful trouble MR.Mann…anyway you still have almost 8 months and 16 days till she makes you pay, really pay….I found the post funny enough but I loved ‘M’s version better. 😛 enjoy your weekend….good luck.
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🙂 what do you think… ha ha ha ..
Thank you so much.. I am glad you found it funny …
Hopw you had a great weekend tooo…
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Good one the best I like is…if u r committed happy v day else happy independence day 🙂
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🙂 thank you.. And yeah if one is committed and happy and true then each day is valentines day 🙂
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there u go…
haha…
thats a pretty way to sign off for the weekend 😛
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YEah it is good with the smile … Hope you had a great weekend ..
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Quite hilarious
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THank you Onkar sir..
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Agree Valentine’s Day is commercial crap. But anyway liked M’s version of Q & A 🙂 A complete 10/10 😀
P.S: Yeah read your interview on reservation and liked it too. The continuation of reservation system for so long with the current implementation is only creating reverse discrimination, increasing/creating hate for the ppl using reservation(due to ppl taking undue advantage of it) , lowering the bar where not required and reducing the quality of manpower at work and degrading the quality of education. I think they should take some cue from private sector. I remember during my counselling time a frnd of mine could not get a particular seat with ranking ~3000 but another frnd with ranking 16000 got the same seat coz of reservation.. This difference was quite huge for us to ignore this as reverse justice. This can’t possibly be social justice, can it be?
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YEah its all silly what happens to the 364 days … dont know …
Thank you for reading the column and agreeing to it .. yeah this is also creating all the problems. I have been through a similar experience myself .. as you gave the example..
Nope it is not a social justice…
Thanks sapna
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ROFL!! Point # 7 is just classic!
You have a great Sunday too, Bik 🙂
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🙂 THank you Deeps.. I hope you had a great day tooo.. and had a great weekend… Mine was superb .. lots of friend lots of daroo and foood 🙂
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Excellent ones. I had a good laugh. I read them 3 times :).
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Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.. Job done .. that was the whole idea to have a smile for the weekend 🙂
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Hey Bikram…
That is cruel…and u can also affirmatively say that these phrases were all from the mouth of a Man…hehe!!! I loved the 7th one specially..how typical men…
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WOWO… I knew someone will make sure to say Its a MAN… but you see the title says Unlikely things .. SO i doubt if these were used .. Though I would not mind using them on some 🙂
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good bikram…to reveal the truth!I can understand DOST “kitna dukh hai dil mein”!
🙂
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Haanji DOST.. I know a lotttt 🙂 he he he he
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Lol! Where do u dig these up from?
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🙂 This was at a comedy show a standup comedy guy 🙂
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Awesome Post Bikram !
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Thank you so much. I am glad you liked it.
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Hahaha that’s very funny!!
number 4 is my favorite
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Thank you so much.. I am glad you liked the one … 🙂
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I liekd the 8th one 😛 You used any of these ? 😀
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Ha ha ha ha .. if you see the title is UNLIKELY statements 🙂 ha ha ha No I have not used though now on hindsight i could have used on a few on whom i wasted time and money 🙂
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and that’s a lovely article on Reservation 🙂 I wonder if any check has been done to actaully how many POOR & Low caste people get into these institutions 🙂
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Thank you so much for that comment.. NO no check has been done .. the thing is when the resertvation was made it was for some years after independance .. But now no minister has the guts to take it off as it will mena no VOTES for him.. thats why .. It will ocntinue for ever…
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#7 had me bursting out loud!!! 😆
So, what’s with sudden Valentine’ Day hatred??
BTW I’ve never much of a fan of the day either….why just one day for proclaiming ur love? So that the other 364 days are for cheating around? 🙄
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🙂 thank you so much.
No no nothing against Valentines day.. Exactly my point why just one day when there are 364 more days what about them …
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ha ha that was a funny post for sure! How r u doin?
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THank you Ria. I am fine 🙂 how you doing ..
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lol.. funny ..
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Thank you Thank you.. 🙂
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rofl! 😀
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ok ok get up off the floor now ..
Thank you 🙂
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HI BIKRAM
Luvd the 7th one…..Hope ur wife dint c it 🙂
HEHEHEHE…….
BTW following u now
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Hi sneha.. Welcome ot this blog, Than you for visitng .. and for following me now yayyyyyyyyyyyyyy 🙂
Glad you liked the 7th one .. Well she is busy ironing did not get time to see this 🙂 so shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh he he he
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HI BIKRAM
Luvd the 7th one…..Hope ur wife dint c it 🙂
HEHEHEHE…….
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Wow.. another comment 🙂 sure helps in increasing the number of comments 🙂
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Ha ha ha… funny list there Bikram.
#7, like most people here seem to have pointed out, is the best (or worst) one.
I would hate my man to ever come up with such a poem. Ugh! 😀
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Thanks a lot .. I ma glad you liked it 🙂
he he hehe I am sure you are such a lovely person your man will be jsut as lovely as you are 🙂
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hahahahaha! Nice nice! Sply 7 n 8!
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Thanks a lot .. I am glad you liked the two of them 🙂
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LOL !!! 😀 😀 I dont think any one would have come near the person with such words for their valentine…. 😉
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🙂 he he he who knows ..
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ROFL 😀 .. :d know what I loved my Alsatien’s eyes 😀 and the second one just reminded me of that 😀
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🙂 I am glad you liked it thank you
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I found the blog funny, but after browsing thru the comments (esp M’s), i think u r (Or wr) in trouble.. hope u handled t well 🙂
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He he he he 🙂 I am glad you found it fine .. I am fine not to worry .. alls well that ends well 🙂
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😆 superb…thank you for sharing these 😀
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Hey CB thank you .. Glad you liked it
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i thought # 5 and 6 were the most amusing!!!
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🙂 glad you liked them
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